"Flash back/forward (I know your agenda mother fucker)" October 5, 2006
18 years old and a star to be...
5 years later a pitiful scene
lost in too many things
finally hit the floor of your dreams.
So here I am, in control of my own
the only downer is waking up alone
sick of the routine, these everyday habits..
I'm not using my heart.. here, you can have it,
my dreams too, my money and fame.
take my whole identity, my life and my name!
sex, drugs, and rock n roll.. all I ever wanted..
is it worth what I've sold? is it worth being haunted?
especially by the same demons day after day
so much has changed since "I want it that way".
And today I wear a broken heart on my chest so honestly
as I'm phading away from all that is beautiful
I hate that I can't love you, but my life is wonderful?!
I hope for a new song, one that I'll love
but I've lost my patience and sacrificed too much
If I saw what I've seen at 15
I never could've handled it. It would've crushed me.
so the bottom line is, any reality to a fantasy is fake..
corrupted by nothing but greed, evil, and hate.
But please still chase your dreams.. I insist!
cuz once your there, (under any circumstances) ..you wont resist!
but then the complexes are growing and now it's showing.
You'll never see things the way I do (poor me)
Not like you, I'm alone in the crowd (poor me)
while your too fucked up to be honest, too scared to lose in any contest in a 1 on 1.
so instead you have your cerebral fun
in conclusion, all you see if half of what you'll get,
that's when you find yourself writing a poem in a question of regret..
while I hate how everything must be your way..
I HATE YOU and your name rhymes with everything you are.. _ _ _..